sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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