I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
