yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I want to walk on stilts...naked
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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