I'm lost and stupid without you.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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