I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
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she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
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I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
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