While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Randomize
