my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
The feeling are messing with the penis
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Randomize