Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
