He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Randomize