worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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