I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
Randomize