I'm so fucking centered right now
So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
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Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
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Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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