He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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