The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
