How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
high people should be assigned attendants
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Randomize
