did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
