Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Randomize
