the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
