Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
Randomize
