I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Randomize