What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Randomize
