Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
