im drinking this country out of the recession.
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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