it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
Randomize
