sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
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