I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
He kissed a someone with a penis
This house was built for laser tag.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
