she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
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