It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
