Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Randomize
