is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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