My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
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i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
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After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
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