my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
