Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
you guys were way drunker than both of me
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
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