Taylor Swift is so right about you.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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