some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
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