tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
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David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
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