If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize
