I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
Randomize
