census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
