STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Randomize
