i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
