he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Randomize
