You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
