I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Randomize
