butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Randomize
