We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
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