So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
