I used to practice getting hit by cars.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize