i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Randomize
