This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
